Spotted in Spain

[neodreamwaters]

If you've ever taken a bus across Spain, you'd know the buses stop every three hours or so to give the passengers a chance to stretch their legs, use the bathroom, or grab something to eat. Some buses have bathrooms onboard but not all, and even then many people prefer to wait for the rest stop. What I've seen happen many times is a mad dash of guys headed for the bathroom. A few months ago when I travelled by bus, I saw among the crowd a young man of Asian descent pissing furiously into the urinal for about forty seconds or so. His eyes were closed and an expression of sheer bliss was on his face.

And just tonight, I was watching a procesión in southern Spain for Semana Santa, basically a big religious parade during the week leading up to Easter, for anyone on the other side of the pond. The procesiones feature people in pointy cowls and musicians, among others. This one also had a giant box with religious sculptures on it, kind of like a float. It was heavy enough to require the muscle power of at least ten people to hoist it in the air. The procesión usually stops every few streets or so to allow the people in it to regroup and for the people carrying the box to rest for a minute.

I was heading back to the place I was staying during one of these rests when I noticed one of the men near the back of the line duck behind a minivan and start to unzip his trousers. I walked past him, but stopped a good five metres behind him. He let loose a splattering stream that I couldn't see from my angle, peering around the sides of the van the whole time to see if anyone could see him. Thankfully, he never turned around. I couldn't always hear his stream, and I'm not sure if that's because he was stopping and starting out of paranoia that the passersby could see him, or if it was just because of the noise, but he pissed for a good minute. When I checked the spot behind the van after he zipped up and headed back, I saw he had left a substantial puddle. I've been seeing these kinds of puddles all around town tonight, and I wonder if they were all caused by guys as desperate as this one.

[Brian]

I love this account. The bus journeys in Spain sound well worth experiencing. And that guy in the procession - phew, from what you say he must have held on until he couldn't wait any longer! I guess he was one of the people carrying the floats, right?

[Fred]

Whenever the streets are filled with celebrating people, especially in a city or town that has few public facilities, some will find themselves with a full bladder and no legitimate place to empty it. It's especially awkward for those that are part of the parade!

Some years ago I travelled a bit in Europe, and none of the buses I was on had onboard toilets, and some of the places where we stopped had very limited facilities. I recall one stop at a restaurant in Italy where the men's (single) toilet was in an open-air shed out behind the building.

[neodreamwaters]

So I was catching the last train tonight after playing some board games at my best friend's place with a few other friends of ours. It was one of those interurban trains whose stops were few and far between, and our train was about 15 minutes late getting into the station. I didn't think anything of it, as I was just reading on my phone. There was your typical crowd of youths catching the last train after predrinking before a night out (or, in this case, while predrinking, as it was the last train and security is generally even less scrupulous at night, if during the day they can even be called that).

It was a bit crowded on the train, but not too crowded for me to find a seat. I was sat in a section facing a large group of young people I'd place at about 18 to 22 years old. It was nearly an hour's trip to my stop, the last stop, but as this was the interurban rail, stops were few and far between as it is. In my field of viewthere was this fairly tall guy with dark curly hair, ear studs, and a nose piercing who was just browsing his phone during the trip, not bothered at all. In the next section, there was this gorgeous young man, medium height, short straight hair, ear studs as well, and who had braces. He was sat with some mixed-company friends in a section of four seats that had two seats facing the other two. I noticed he had a litre-and-a-half bottle of Don Simón tinto de verano (basically red wine mixed with a lemon soda, and a brand that's notorious for being dirt cheap, popular with partygoers). From the looks of it, he had about half a litre left in it, possibly a bit more, but he was taking swigs from it every now and then, and I do mean generous swigs that made his cheeks puff up with how much he was drinking. There was a point where I saw him take three swigs from it in the same minute, and I wondered what kind of effect it was having on his bladder, especially since he was affected by the 15-minute delay as well. Men of that age aren't generally known for good planning, and 15 minutes can make or break whether they can find a place to piss in time.

Well, I didn't have to wonder for long as I heard him say 'Me estoy meando' ('I need a piss') to his friends, just as we were pulling into a stop that I'd say was about 30 minutes from the station where we got on. He and his friends got up to get off the train, and I took the opportunity to move into their section, onto a seat that was perpendicular to the section where they had been sat and that was directly facing the windows. I sometimes get a little queasy when I'm sat facing the opposite direction that the train's moving in, but at least on this interurban line, all the forward-facing seats are also facing other seats, and I generally like to avoid sitting in those sections where I awkwardly face strangers if it can be helped. It's different if I'm travelling with friends, but that's rare for me.

Anyways, some friends of theirs in another section of the train were calling out, telling them not to get off that stop; it was the next one (the two stops in question have very similar names), so they sat back down, as it would be another five minutes or so to the stop where they were meant to get off. Most of them sat back down, except for the straight-haired guy, who was stood up, resting his arms on the top of the seat where he was sat before. The curly-haired guy, to my surprise, was actually in his group, and he sat opposite the seat where the straight-haired guy had been sitting. I now had a full-on view of the two of them, now that I was sat sideways. 'Me estoy meando en serio, chavales,' the straight-haired guy said ('I seriously need a piss, guys') and the curly-haired guy replied: 'Me estoy meando también' ('I need a piss too'). Neither of them showed any obvious signs of being desperate for a piss, but some people truly don't even when they are about to lose it. The straight-haired guy was moving his legs a tiny bit, but if I hadn't heard him verbalise his need for a piss or seen how much he'd drunk, I wouldn't have batted an eyelid: he didn't seem any more fidgety than anyone else who was stood up in a moving train for a while. Also, in my experience, Spanish guys in general have a tendency to over-dramatise things, especially when it comes to physical needs such as needing a piss.

One of his other male friends in the group asked him if he had time to pop to the onboard toilets, which were actually just in the section behind where I was sat backwards before I moved to get a sideways-facing seat. Almost as a reply, the announcement for the next stop played, their actual stop. As the train was slowing to a halt, I heard the straight-haired guy say 'Me estoy meando mucho, no aguanto más' ('I have to piss so bad. I can't hold it'). They were a much larger group than I'd expected, a good 20 or more I'd say. I overheard one of them saying that it would be about a 10-minute walk to the party or event they were all heading to.

If it hadn't been the last train, and if their stop had been anywhere remotely near where I'm staying (it was about 15 minutes' travel, or several hours' walk), I'd have gotten off with them and headed in their general direction for a while, pretending to follow an address on my satnav or something, just to see if the straight-haired guy ended up whipping it out in the street or between two cars or by a skip or something to have a piss. I'd bet good money that he did, though: if he was truly as desperate as he'd said he was, I doubt he'd have been able to make it to their party or event without having a piss first.

[Wombat48]

Great sighting! I would have been tempted to follow as well lol

[Brian]

Yes, I'd have wanted to follow the group too.

It must have seemed the most natural thing in the world for that gorgeous straight-haired guy to take a huge bottle of cheap Don Simón to gulp down to pass the time in the journey to where they were going. The consequences for his bladder presumably never crossed his mind until it was suddenly a major issue for him!

I must try and popularise Don Simón here in Northern Europe.

[Asdfg5658]

Wow, such hot descriptions. Thanks for sharing them with us!